King Theoden, Lord Of The Rings; The Two Towers.
Evil. That's the only thing I could think when I heard about the Connecticut school shooting. 20 children and 6 adults. Dead. A senseless crime against humanity. Why? Because it's Evil. Evil doesn't make sense. Evil just does the complete opposite of Good...just because. It's gut-wrenching.
I'm not going to try and explain what was the reason for the heinous crime or try to imagine God's plan in all of this. But I wanted to discuss something that might help shed some light on how Christians should react to situations like this. In other words, I am going to rant for a little.
I felt something new this week. Well, okay, this is the second time I've had this feeling. The first time was when I heard about the Batman Massacre earlier this year. I'm ashamed of it, but I know I must overcome this Demon instead of trying to side step around it. You might have felt it too, but you want to ignore it.
'True Christians should never think like that!' you might think. I know I thought that for a while.
I am a murderer. I've hated these people to the point of wishing I could end their sorry lives. I'm being deadly serious. I hated these people's guts, especially the shooter in Connecticut. How could you ever justify going after children!? I was so angry. The tears I cried were from hate and anger, not sadness.
But even in the midst of my inner turmoil, God's hand continued to stay on my shoulder. He doesn't blame me for these thoughts, but he does want me to turn away from them. My hate is gone, but I still cannot forgive them. Not yet. I know I should and I probably will, but for now, I cannot. Even though I do not hate them, bitterness still remains and my sympathy for the families who have lost so much reminds me of the Evil these men have done.
Then I remember; how much harder is it for these families you have lost their little ones and mothers...and so close to Christmas?
Oh God, help us to forgive. Give us the strength to carry on despite the world's efforts to pull us down in the mud and filth. It hurts. It hurts so much. The pain in my heart. The anger is gone and is replaced with bewilderment, confusion and a heavy heart. How much more do these parents hurt? How much more do these children and fathers hurt? Why God!? Why?
Teach us to forgive. I think, for the most part, we have forgotten how to do that. To ignore the pain these men have inflicted upon us, to remember that we are just as guilty in your eyes as these murderers and that all deserve grace and mercy. God, stand with us. Keep us strong. Help us to praise you in the storm. We don't have to thank you, but help us to remember who you are, that you are God, and that you will never abandon you.
"For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you" Isaiah 41:13
